The Three Things I’ll Miss the Most About Teaching

Depending on the source you believe, between 40% and 50% of teachers will leave the classroom in their first five years. In just over a month, I will be adding to that particular statistic by leaving teaching, possibly permanently. This will have been my fifth year teaching and the decision to change careers has not been one that came easily. It seems like each year there are more and more articles published in which former teachers and soon-to-be former teachers explain all the reasons why they are leaving teaching. At this point, it has all been said, often by professionals more eloquent and intelligent than I am.  If you want to know some of the reasons that so many teachers are leaving, Google “Why teachers quit” or check out this article, or this one, or this one. While those three articles range from informative to regretful to scathing and all have some viewpoints that I have shared at one time or another, I would rather end my tenure by reflecting on the three things I’ll miss the most.

1. The Kids (Most of the Time)

First off, it is time to admit that not all students get along with all teachers. Just like with adults, there are people you like and people you do not like. However, for the most part, I really like a lot of my kids, especially the ones who fly under the radar. By that I mean the kids who show up, do their work, laugh at my corny jokes, and are generally successful. Those are the students I feel bad for as I have to stop what I am doing and discipline the same students for the eighth time in a week.

This is what you get for assigning homework.

Realistically, even some of the students who are “problem children” are some of my favorites. As a grown up ADHD kid, I fully understand the ones who are bouncing off of the walls and need to roam the classroom a bit more. Teaching primarily freshmen over the past five years has allowed me to see some very bright and interesting young people (especially the problem children) mature and develop into impressive young men and women. I will really miss trying to push kids out of their comfort zone and helping guide the ones who are willing to take that push and run with it.

The Big Mo!

I’ve always thought that momentum has a massive effect on how a day goes. With some momentum, I can roll through a day of teaching and coach afterwards then still get stuff done. However, when I feel like I can’t get a rhythm going, even getting off the couch can be hard.

When I began this blog about two and half years ago, I intended to make it a weekly(ish) blog to replace posting constant Facebook statuses about different crazy things that have happened while I have been teaching. Thus far, I have not even come close to achieving that goal. Time has been part of the issue, but a lack of ideas that I thought anyone would want to read about has also been issue. BUT, after a bout of equal parts boredom and motivation on Friday night, I wrote about why I coach. At some point this week or weekend, I should have “Why I Teach” written.

So what I need from you are some topics you want to hear about so that I can keep the momentum going! What do you wish you knew about teaching or coaching? Or a particular educational theory? Or rugbying? Or the life of a teacher outside of school? Or…other…stuff? I will provide the disclaimer that there are certain things that, as an actively employed teacher, I’m not particularly comfortable posting on the internet. So comment on this sucker and give me some ideas! Help me help you!

8 Rules for Dealing With Your Kid’s Coach

It’s been a while since I wrote on here (probably almost a year). There are lots of reasons that I could point at, but realistically I have just been lazy. Since I am battling laziness this year, I figured I would sit down and actually write something!

Coaching has been by far my favorite part about teaching. Some of the most inspirational people in my life have been coaches, from Coach Buck for football to Coach Helmer and everyone in between and since has helped shape the kind of coach I became. My first year teaching, I was supposed to be an assistant coach for the rugby club (not a team since rugby isn’t VHSL approved). The head coach got busy with school and his life and before I knew it, I was thrown into the head coaching position. That first year hooked me; we finished a game away from a state title and the kids and I have both stayed hungry since then. My second year, I was the head coach of the cross country team in addition to rugby and last year I coached the runningbacks and special teams for the football team. One of the biggest challenges for me has been the interactions with the parents. In no particular order, here are some thoughts about things that parents should and should not do to help their children’s coaches**.

1. Do NOT pry after a loss. I take a loss as a coach much harder than I did as a player. When I am playing, I at least have some bit of control over the outcome of the game. As a coach, you have much less than most people think. I can teach a player when to kick, how to kick, and why to kick, but I can’t get onto the field to kick it for him. Coaches typically become coaches because they were so competitive as players and had such a desire to win. Losing sucks. Coaches are mad after a loss and might be a bit curt with our responses, so give it a few hours and let us deal with it however we need to.
2. Don’t pressure the coach about your child’s playing time. To be clear, asking a coach why your child hasn’t played much is fine (as long as you don’t do it right after a loss). In fact, it may help you help your son or daughter develop as an athlete and person. At the high school level and above, if the coach gives you a reason, then you may need to accept that reason. There is a lot of pressure to win, whether it is school created or self-inflicted, and at some point a coach just has to play the best athletes. Reasoning for playing or sitting athletes depends on each coach. I have sat players for grades, in school behavior, and lack of effort at practice. Overall, my philosophy is that if you can’t dedicate yourself in all the aspects which I require, then you are not a player I want to count on in the last part of a game. That being said, there is little more frustrating than a parent pressuring me to explain why their son was on the bench when I am with them all week and see them practice and interact with them in the school.
3. Don’t put your kid on a pedestal. Everyone wants to believe that their child is an amazing athlete, but the numbers don’t lie; not every high school football player will play in the NFL or even in college. If your son/daughter works hard and gives their all, the best thing you can ask for is a chance for them to continue playing at a higher level, if they want to. Don’t tell a coach how astoundingly athletic your son or daughter is, let your child show them.
4. Don’t pressure your kid to play a sport that they do not like. This year was my first coaching football. About a week in, I noticed a kid who worked pretty hard, but didn’t seem to have any desire to be there. His dad pushed him into playing football when, realistically, all he wanted to do was run cross country with his girlfriend. Not everyone wants to be a football player or whatever sport a father or mother played in high school. Ask your kid if they are enjoying the sports they play and make sure they feel comfortable honestly answering that question.
5. Be careful coaching your own child. At a lower level (Pop Warner, Little League, Rec League, etc) winning is rarely a big deal. The point of your child playing a sport at that level is primarily socialization and experience with the sport. As such, it is not a big deal to be coaching your own son or daughter, because everyone should be playing and the competition isn’t as significant to the experience. When you get to the high school level, however, winning becomes one of the top priorities. Add in grades, college recruiting, and in school issues, and things get complicated quickly. Some parents and their children have the type of relationship which allows these issues not to get in the way of parenting, but it can get tricky fast. I can’t imagine how you choose to start or not start your son or daughter, or how difficult it would be to take them out if they are playing poorly. The key word here is careful.
6. You may not know more than the coach. Other than just knowing the players extremely well, a coach often knows the sport very well. Last spring, I had a woman who was related to a couple players (aunt, neighbor, I don’t really remember) come up to me and tell me she would like to come help at practices because she knew some drills and then she began to point out some of the issues that we had that game. Later, I found out that she had been playing rugby for about a year. I know that I am young, but I have also been playing rugby for the better part of a decade. I have played every position on the field and I still play for a local men’s team to make sure that I don’t fall behind. Being older does not make you more experienced, it just makes you older. Even if you played the sport for years, the coach may know something you don’t know. Good coaches constantly work on their craft, reflect, and attend different clinics to learn more. In most cases, parents haven’t stepped onto a competitive field since their children were young. Trust the coach. But…
7. Coaches are not perfect. We make mistakes. We dwell on those mistakes. We pressure ourselves to never make another mistake and then, like clockwork, we make another one. Every game, win or loss, I wonder what I could have done differently or better. A good coach reflects on every bit of competition and surrounds him or herself with others who will help make those decisions. Ask your coach questions, but try not to harp on their mistakes. We focus on them enough.
8. DO help the coach out through boosters and support. I saved this for last because this is by far the MOST important rule. The rugby club gets NO school funding due to its club status at the school. Before my first season even started, a player’s mother came up to me to ask what she could do to help. We simply call her “Mama” because she runs so much of the off-field procedures for me. I am infinitely thankful that she takes care of raising money and feeding the kids and all of those types of needs, because it frees me up to just coach. Parents showing up and helping support the kids, whether financially or by just watching and cheering, shows the kids what is really important – them. Support your son or daughter as much as you can because even if it temporarily embarrasses them for some reason, they will always be appreciative.

This list is far from exhaustive and I am sure there are areas that some parents or coaches won’t agree on. I know I do not have kids, but these are things that I have seen or experienced from the coaching side of things. I am sure there are things I forgot, but like rule number seven says, coaches aren’t perfect.

**To be clear, my coaching experience is at the high school and college levels, so that is what I will focus on here. 

You’re Not Crazy for Talking to Yourself, You’re Crazy for Answering

In an episode of How I Met Your Mother, one of the main characters (Marshall) finds a letter that he wrote to his adult self when he was fifteen. When I recently caught a re-run of this episode, it made me wonder what teenage Benn would say to adult Benn. But, since I am such a one upper, I imagined a conversation with ten year old Benn AND sixteen year old Benn. That’s way harder to picture than just one other person!

Adult Benn: Oh hey guys, good to see you!

16 Year Old Benn: Dude…you got fat.

10 Year Old Benn: Yeah!

Adult: I mean yeah, I’m bigger than you guys, but it isn’t that bad. I’m dropping extra weight now since practices start soon.

10 Year Old Benn: FOR YOUR HOCKEY TEAM???

Adult: Ummm…no. I never ended up learning to ice skate well enough to play hockey.

10 Year Old Benn: oh.

16 Year Old Benn: Are you playing football still at least??

Adult: Uh….not really. I stopped playing football when I graduated high school. I actually play rugby now!

16 Year Old Benn: That’s gay.

Adult: Do you even know what rugby is?

16 Year Old Benn: Yea man. It’s gay.

Adult: Right…so anyway…

16 Year Old Benn: Where are your sleeve tattoos? Shouldn’t you have flames around your wrists?

10 Year Old Benn: AND A HUGE DRAGON ON YOUR BACK!!!

Adult: Yeah guys I actually grew out of both of those ideas. I have tattoos, but I kept them where I could hide them under a t-shirt. Ya know, for jobs.

16 Year Old Benn: Sell out.

10 Year Old Benn: OH!! Are you a professional wrestler now? Do you make lots of money?

16 Year Old Benn: Dude, wrestling is dumb. Loser.

Adult: Yeah…no I’m definitely not a wrestler. I stopped watching wrestling when I was like 14.

16 Year Old Benn: Yeah, seriously. Besides you were always going to be a mechanic. No way you went to extra school after high school was over!

Adult: Um…I kinda went to college. For a while.

16 Year Old Benn: Dude seriously? For how long? You quit, right?

Adult: Well no. I graduated. And then I went back to get my master’s degree.

16 Year Old Benn: Wow. Tool.

10 Year Old Benn: YOU’RE A MASTER??? SO PEOPLE CALL YOU MASTER???

Adult: …people don’t really do that after you get a master’s degree…

16 Year Old Benn: You’re a master of being gay.

Adult: Seriously man? Is that the only word you know? Wait! I know you know more words! Stop using that one!

16 Year Old Benn: Heh heh…gay.

Adult: COME ON MAN!

10 Year Old Benn: Well what do you do? Are you an archaeologist? Do you get to dig up awesome dinosaur bones??

Adult: Sigh. I wish man. Don’t worry, no matter how old you get, dinosaurs stay awesome.

16 Year Old Benn: Are you like a business man? You’re your own boss right???

Adult: Actually I ended up becoming a teacher! Who would have guessed, right?

10 Year Old Benn: Boo!

16 Year Old Benn: Seriously? Ok, ok, are you at least teaching science or something cool?

Adult: I don’t teach science…

16 Year Old Benn: Business classes?

Adult: Actua –

10 Year Old Benn: P.E.!!!!!!

Adult: No, I –

10 Year Old Benn: RECESS!!!!

Adult: Dude no! Calm down! I teach…English.

10 and 16 year old Benn: ENGLISH?????

Adult: Yeah I know you hate it guys. It gets way better in college. Besides you both like to read.

10 Year Old Benn: Yeah I do!

16 Year Old Benn: No I don’t!

Adult: Don’t worry guys, you’ll enjoy it when you get here.

16 Year Old Benn: Ok…maybe we can still save this. Do you teach at like some cool school where you don’t have to get up until noon?

Adult: …I was up at 4:30 today.

16 Year Old Benn: You’re dead to me.

Adult: Do you realize the irony of that statement.

16 Year Old Benn: …gay.

10 Year Old Benn: Can we get ice cream?

So, in summary, 10 year old Benn was a ball of energy with ridiculous goals and no ability to focus on anything for more than five seconds. 16 year old Benn hates everything because it is all gay. Adult Benn hopes that his kids aren’t as big of jerks as he was. Who cares what a couple of punk kids think of me anyway?

What Has Me Burning Now

One word: accountability. Without some sense of consequences, the kids we teach and raise never adjust to the real world. There are lots of reasons to make excuses, but at what point are we just hamstringing the kids, permanently crippling the maturation process? I will readily admit that I almost didn’t graduate high school. I was lazy and unmotivated until I had a real reason to do work. I hated homework (sweet sweet irony), but always did well on tests and quizzes, so I usually pulled high C’s or low B’s. And then I almost found a way to fail my 12^th grade English class (yeah, the plot thickens). Mr. Tlumack was my English teacher and definitely one of the best teachers I have ever had. He did not baby me, he did not give me a packet of make up work; instead, he told me that I would fail if I didn’t do the work. He took a few minutes and explained to me why I was failing and what it meant for my future, especially considering that I had already been accepted to CNU. As I look around, I see the same conversation occurring with many of my co-workers with students (along with hearing about it at other schools). However, it doesn’t seem to be sticking the same way with these kids like it stuck with me. I feel like it has been a collaborative effort to ruin our kids, aided by the “participant trophy” generation, in which everyone has to be equal and everyone is a winner, and steadily relaxing standards (despite “standardized testing”). In the real world you do not get extensions on due dates, you do not get make up opportunities, and you do not get “participant trophies” when you lose a job to a better candidate. But luckily, we have standardized testing to tell us who is and is not good enough. Too bad our kids aren’t standardized, huh?

Let the Football Jargon Commence!

Last year during a professional development conference, a (former) co-worker and I discussed what round we would go in if teaching had an NFL style draft. As the discussion continued, we debated the Mel Kiper style pros and cons of each of our teaching abilities. I have since thought about that conversation and if there was a NTL (National Teaching League) draft, I came up with this as my prospect profile coming out of college:

Prospect: Benn Lynch (SE*)

Height: 5’10”

Weight: 190 lbs

College: CNU

Overview: Lynch is a fit for anywhere between 7^th grade and 10^th grade, with 8^th or 9^th being ideal. Has mostly middle school experience. Exhibits basic classroom management intangibles and natural ability, but sometimes relies too much on these developmental level skills to cover for incomplete planning. Lynch has shown flashes of brilliance that have piqued interest from several divisions.

Strengths: Lynch is very sound in his relationship building abilities. He is often able to diffuse situations and has a great “teacher voice” when necessary. Runs games well to hit bodily-kinesthetic learners. Creates teacher tools relatively easily and shows signs of lesson development creativity. Very involved in support of athletic events and shows strong coaching potential.

Weaknesses: Lynch’s biggest weakness is his over-confidence; he often appears to find himself in over his head, but does not seem interested in or able to accept help. Is not an “over-preparer” and does not show strong organizational skills. Has shown signs of chronic procrastination. Responds to suggestion and instruction, but extremely resistant to orders, which narrows the administrations he can succeed with. Does not have one of the strongest GPAs in this draft class.

Final Pick Analysis: Drafted in the late second round by Denbigh High School due mostly to potential abilities. Should be an immediate starter in 9^th grade English.

In all seriousness, I have spent a lot of time recently thinking about similarities and differences between teaching and the NFL. Here are four reasons why my job is harder than those of many NFL draftees:

1. Teachers are all immediate starters: There is no opportunity for me to sit for a year or two to develop behind an experienced starter and then take the reins when that teacher retires. The closest thing to that is student teaching, which is more like sitting behind a starter who gets injured in week one; you head in with some basic tools, but you’re taking over another starter’s team (students) mid-year and trying to test out what you are and are not good at. Even with that experience, you are still flying solo that first year.
2. Teachers are ALL expected to succeed: When you draft a player in the 7^th round of the draft, you hope he works out, but you don’t depend on it. When you hire a teacher, you expect him/her to work out. You are given help, but you’re the starter and you’re expected to be there every week of your contract.
3. Preparation vs Gameday: In a typical NFL week, you play on Sunday, have a break on Monday, and practice and prepare Tuesday to Saturday. In my typical teaching week, I “play” Monday to Friday, with each game followed by some extra practice and preparation after each game, and extra preparation on Sundays (I refuse to work on school work on Saturdays). During rugby season, add three 3-hour practices a week and most of Saturday mornings for games.
4. Competitive Salaries: Salary differences are a no-brainer with even practice squad players making more money than teachers. However, a major difference is salary competition. Typically, teacher salaries are on a scale basis, rather than a negotiated contract. The best teachers are often paid the same as the not so best if they are in the same district and have a similar number of years. If you do really well, you don’t get to hold out and renegotiate. You can always transfer to a different district, but there are no guarantees that your salary will truly increase when you add in a change in travel time or cost of living differences.

As I re-read all this, it almost seems like a lot of reasons not to be a teacher. They definitely aren’t; they are reasons that I am challenged more regularly than an NFL player. I can honestly say after almost a year and a half of teaching, I still love it. When I complain about little things, people ask me if I will stay in the profession and my response is almost always the same: of course. I honestly can’t see myself doing anything else right now or anytime in the near future. I would miss a lot of it, especially the coaching. Rugby practices start in less than a month and the season starts in exactly two months from today; I am already getting stoked to be back on the field! Oh, and I promise to try not to let months go by without an update again.

*SE = Secondary English